If you are in a relationship,you know that feeling. That voice in your head that asks you,’Are you still sexy?’ Do you still have it? Can you still turn heads at the supermarket,at church,at the hospital,bus station and while walking home, but can’t seem to get the same reaction from your signigicant other once you get home? Someone somewhere used to think you were hot and happening. Within seconds of being around you,they made you aware of it. So where did you lose their attention? First of,how are some people able to keep the attention of someone?

The good old saying,’don’t talk about it,be about it’ summarises it for me. Isn’t it true that, people we find desirable are those who have their stuff together. They exude confidence by simply going about their life. Think of the people you consider successful (whatever success is to you). Don’t you think they are sexy? Really really having it together is not acting like you have it together.

How can you be more desirable…

Its simple. By having a thriving life outside of your love relationship and pursuing it with undetered focus.

  • W0rk on your body
  • Work on your mind and soul
  • Work on your spirituality
  • Work on your creativity

…and do all these while your mouth is shut!

Easier said than done in this day and age where tooting your own horn and humble bragging on social media is all the rage. Just don’t go yapping about all you are up to. SHUT UP!

Don’t yap about your work out,or your good looks,or showoff how smart you are by going on and on about topics rarely delved into or whatever you imagine makes you sound smart and ish.

Don’t yap about the books you are reading and what you are learning!

Don’t yap about your new projects either.

Remember,don’t talk about it,be about it!!!

This will cause you to have a light in your eyes and a smile on your face that says you have unimaginable depths and you are upto something but people have to come super close to know of it because your lips are sealed. Thats called being mysterious. So please,do not shout from the rooftop about your plans and achievements. Infact,get off whatsapp and the internet everytime you want to open your mouth and brag.

Do this instead;

Evaluate areas in your life that need more effort and work at them. Dedicate about four hours of your day to what you want to master and work on it with undetered focus.

Don’t forget to have fun aswell. Laugh out loud and be joyfull (note,I did not say happy). Happiness is a byproduct. Its a feeling basically. Joy is what you should work on having more of. Yes. Work. It does not come easy. Be proactive and be consistent and then take out a journal and write the results it. Lets meet at the next post.